Day 4

I've never believed in fate or destiny. It always seemed trite, frivolous. I have always believed that I make my own way, I've turned the tide of battles single-handed. What possible control could the galaxy have on a person like me? Why would it bother? Yet, I'm beginning to wonder. Queen Zaryfa told me before I came, "Sarin, sometimes there are greater things at work. Things even those of us who are gifted to be able to see, don't understand or cannot comprehend. I have no idea why this is so, but it is. You will find your destiny in the autumn rain under twin moons, it will take you across the galaxy and back again and while you will think yourself destroyed it will make you invincible."

I'm still not sure I understand what she was saying, but I do know one thing. I'm terrified.

I finally saw him in person last night and . . . he has to be the most terrifying being I have ever met. He projects his hatred for everything so strongly that I'm sure even non-empaths can feel it. But, there is so much pain there it makes me just want to take and hold him and make all the pain go away. I hate that he is just going to see me as another enemy. It has to be this way . . . for now.

He's supposed to be sleeping now, but even though he is three stories below me in the basement sleeping quarters with the other Sentinels I can still feel his presence. He overpowers everything else. Youli told me that he is heavily medicated to keep his empathic abilities to a manageable level. I'm not surprised. He could easily drive other empaths insane.

Other than his incredible abilities, I found him to be rather intriguing. I hope I'll be able to get to know what he is really like as a person, not just as the current co-tac.