Day 6

So, shopping went fine. Things were not fine once we got back though. I should never have left. Qadira is more of a tyrant than I'd believed possible. She hurt him. Really hurt him. I think she is trying to kill him.

Yuoli spent all evening and most of the night working on him and he is still going to be in sick bay long enough to miss the next mission. I haven't been down to visit him. I need to wait until he's asleep.

Day 5

It frosted last night. I got up early this morning to go out to the stables and everything was covered in white. So odd. I'd never seen it before, but it reminds me of the way his presence seems to permeate everything now. Nothing is left untouched.

Gods and demons it's cold!

At least Youli and I are going down to Suyla for the day to go shopping. I hadn't packed much cold weather gear and they don't like us wearing the autotemp cloth here. I'm actually really surprised at just how little technology they do use here at the manor. Youli says it's mostly because of the little co-tac. Things seem to get broken or become unusable around him. So I am learning how to do things a bit more low tech. Which is fun . . . even if it is a bit annoying.

I'll log back in after we go shopping and show you some of the things I got.

Day 4

I've never believed in fate or destiny. It always seemed trite, frivolous. I have always believed that I make my own way, I've turned the tide of battles single-handed. What possible control could the galaxy have on a person like me? Why would it bother? Yet, I'm beginning to wonder. Queen Zaryfa told me before I came, "Sarin, sometimes there are greater things at work. Things even those of us who are gifted to be able to see, don't understand or cannot comprehend. I have no idea why this is so, but it is. You will find your destiny in the autumn rain under twin moons, it will take you across the galaxy and back again and while you will think yourself destroyed it will make you invincible."

I'm still not sure I understand what she was saying, but I do know one thing. I'm terrified.

I finally saw him in person last night and . . . he has to be the most terrifying being I have ever met. He projects his hatred for everything so strongly that I'm sure even non-empaths can feel it. But, there is so much pain there it makes me just want to take and hold him and make all the pain go away. I hate that he is just going to see me as another enemy. It has to be this way . . . for now.

He's supposed to be sleeping now, but even though he is three stories below me in the basement sleeping quarters with the other Sentinels I can still feel his presence. He overpowers everything else. Youli told me that he is heavily medicated to keep his empathic abilities to a manageable level. I'm not surprised. He could easily drive other empaths insane.

Other than his incredible abilities, I found him to be rather intriguing. I hope I'll be able to get to know what he is really like as a person, not just as the current co-tac.

Day 3

I'm so tired. My meeting with Qadira was exhausting in more ways than one. I really don't know if I am up to this. The pain tabs aren't helping and I think I might go see Youli if this headache doesn't let up soon.

I was really looking forward to seeing him when he gets home but I don't want to meet him looking and feeling like I've been trampled by a dika.

I'm going to go lay down for a while.

Day 2

Things have been interesting. Woke up this morning only to realize I'm still on ship time and no one else would be up for several hours. So I took the opportunity to wander around a bit. This place never seems to sleep and I'm finding the Sentinels might be a bit of a distraction. Or at least a useful way to cement my personna. They seem a bit wary of me, which I find amusing.
I found out that Yuoli is here. I'm excited to go see her. I haven't seen the healer in almost a year. Not since the last gala. I'm sure she's got lots of interesting things to tell me. She might even know something about him.
I have to meet with Qadira today and I am not looking forward to that. She and I have never been the best of friends and now I have to appease her in anyway I can. I just hope that my shields hold. She's notorious for digging for information with out permission. If she wasn't one of the Elite she probably would have been locked up as a psyvamp. I'm twitching just thinking about it. I hope our Queen is right about doing this. I really do.
It's raining again. I wish it would have been clear so I could see the mountians. All I got to see yesterday as I came in for my landing was fog and the landing zone once I got close enough. Nothing like flying by your sensors alone to give you a thrill. I hear this place, the Fall Manor is rather imposing yet beautiful and I'm actually looking forward to seeing it in the daylight. I'm looking forward to seeing the autumn as well. I've been told it's quite beautiful.
Only one more day before he gets back!

Day 1 Infiltration

I never imagined that I would find myself being sent out on guard duty. I am after all The Baroness of Sal'Or. Yet Zuleykha cannot be denied. She made a rather convincing argument for it after all. Who could resist such an assignment?
I'm still in orbit above Belarus waiting for clearance to land. He isn't here. He's gone on a mission and isn't due back for two more days. Well, that gives me time to get settled and assume my role. That is the one part I'm not looking forward to. He's going to hate me. I'm going to hate myself, but hopefully it all works out in the end.